Desperation
of swimming
too deep
beneath
the surface
quick paddle
of feet
an unmitigated focus
on the rippling sun
*
of so many pleases oneaftertheother without pause
*
of wide eyes
*
of fists clenched
crescent indents left
on skin
*
of laughter just a bit too loud
*
of “you’re so whitewashed”
historically being
a compliment
to the yellow-skinned
*
of lightening products
applied
twice daily
of lotions meant
to slow
down
the process
of aging
*
of feet stumbling
quickstep
in their attempt
to catch up
*
of swimming too far out into the horizon
causing
weight in arms
that moment of forgetting
which way
is land
| Jacqueline Young |
|
levelheaded: Desperation
We suggest reading each stanza with the title in mind, perhaps repeating it before reading each stanza’s opening “of.” The title drives Jacqueline Young’s poem, injects motion into each image.
We found the poem understated yet direct. The second stanza, for instance, puts together “oneaftertheother” combining shape and meaning, demonstrating the desperate urgency of “so many pleases without pause.” The third stanza settles for “wide eyes” – quiet, simple, unadorned. The fifth offers a sonic manifestation in the form of “laughter just a bit too loud.” Here too the clear sense of panic or unease is delivered through an image we can easily recognize.
Desperation is exacerbated as the poem progresses. Two stanzas, one speaking of the term “whitewashed” and the demeaning history of its use, and another referring to the use of “lightening products,” shift the poem from the personal to the social. The latter stanza contains three sections beginning with “of,” the last of which is “of aging,” a desperation of its own.
The poem ends not with an “of” line but with an “is” line: “that moment of forgetting / which way / is land.” That final line, which on its own implies finding land even as the sentence suggests the opposite, leaves us with a bit of hope to negate some of the desperation. An “is” line could be a bit of an identity definition, as in a poem we published once upon a time. “Land” offers “Desperation” a sense of stability, relief. Is this indeed a “moment of forgetting” for the speaker, or does it also evoke a sense of remembering? We are calmed by the poem’s controlled tone; feel comfortable with the ambivalence.
– The Editors
